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Top Ten Confusing Place Names

Posted by Ian Brown, Tuesday, 10th March 2009

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Following the example of Alex’s Rudest Place Names post, I hereby present my top ten confusing place names.

For each of these sights, I picture a confused driver arriving in town, rolling down the car window and asking a passer-by  “Can you tell me where I am?”

10. Smile, KY

Smile

Driver: Can you tell me where I am?

Passer-by: Smile!

Driver: <grinning widely> I said, can you tell me where I am?

9.  Okay, OK

Okay

Driver: Can you tell me where I am?

Passer-by: Okay.

<pause>

Driver:  I said, can you tell me where I am?

Passer-by: Okay.

<pause>

… repeat ad nauseam.

8. Uncertain, TX

Uncertain

Driver: Can you tell me where I am?

Passer-by: Uncertain.

Driver: Oh, you’re lost as well?

7. Goodnight, TX

Goodnight

Driver: Can you tell me where I am?

Passer-by: Goodnight.

Driver: Huh? It’s 11 o’ clock in the morning.

6. Stop, GA

Stop

Driver: Can you tell me where I am?

Passer-by: Stop.

Driver: But I am stopped …

5. Nameless, TN

Nameless

Driver: Can you tell me where I am?

Passer-by: Nameless.

Driver: No wonder I can’t find where I am on this map.

4. Panic, PA

Panic

Driver: Can you tell me where I am?

Passer-by: Panic.

Driver: Aaaagh. Won’t you just tell me where I am, I’m totally lost and I can’t take it any more…

3. Halfway, Yorkshire and Halfway, OR1

Halfway Halfway

Driver: Can you tell me where I am?

Passer-by: Halfway.

Driver: Halfway to where?

Passer-by: No, you’re all the way to Halfway.

Driver: I’m confused….

2. Yell, TN

Yell

Driver: Can you tell me where I am?

Passer-by: Yell.

Driver: CAN YOU TELL ME WHERE I AM?

1. Why, AZ

Why

Driver: Can you tell me where I am?

Passer-by: Why.

Driver: Well, I’m lost. Where am I?

Passer-by: Why.

… repeat ad nauseam.


  1. Bonus trivia: Halfway, OR changed it’s name to Half.com in 1999 when it took an internet company’s sponsorship in a bid to improve the town’s financial situation. 

46 Responses to 'Top Ten Confusing Place Names'

  1. Chris says:

    This may not totally qualify due to spelling, but having lived there, I can tell you, Weare, NH (pronounced like “where”) is chock full of Abbot and Costello-esque jokes. “Where do you go to school?” “Yes.” …and the list goes on. In this instance it would be, “Driver: Can you tell me where I am?” “Passerby: Yes.” “Driver: … so, uhm, are you going to tell me where I am?” “Passerby: Yes.” Wash, rinse, repeat.

  2. Claude says:

    I thought Hell, Michigan (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hell,_Michigan) would have been on one of these lists. I’ve always wanted to travel there and see if the roads into town were paved with good intentions.

  3. Zee says:

    I’ve been to Why and my name is Zee… it was fun. I have a picture of myself standing at the end of the sign to the WXY bar/cafe. =)

  4. There’s also a “halfway” in the Neterlands. Search for “Halfweg Haarlemmerliede”

    Placemark: Google Maps / Google Earth

  5. Zee says:

    Things of interest in Why

    Why used to have a HUGE fake bull with cheap looking glowing eyes from red light bulbs.

    A VERY hard to reach mailbox
    Placemark: Google Maps / Google Earth

    Oldly a few pictures were taken from the street view car on a different time of the day in Why… BUT WHY? maybe because the clouds look amazing. Also if you look on sat or street view here this has to win the award for the most patched road.
    Placemark: Google Maps / Google Earth

    and lastly not a link but a hunt. When we drove south through the pipes national monument there were tarantulas every once in a while on the road… not small ones but the kind you can spot and know what they are driving sixty. sounds like a hunt for anybody bored.

  6. Meryl says:

    Theres actually a bunch of Halfways all throughout the country.

    Halfway, MD

    Placemark: Google Maps / Google Earth

    Halfway House, PA

    Placemark: Google Maps / Google Earth

    Halfway, NY

    Placemark: Google Maps / Google Earth

    Halfway Mountain, AK

    Placemark: Google Maps / Google Earth

    Halfway, AR

    Placemark: Google Maps / Google Earth

    Halfway, OR

    Placemark: Google Maps / Google Earth

    Halfway, KY

    Placemark: Google Maps / Google Earth

    Halfway Mountain, ME

    Placemark: Google Maps / Google Earth

    Halfway, MO

    Placemark: Google Maps / Google Earth

    Halfway, NM

    Placemark: Google Maps / Google Earth

    Halfway, TN

    Placemark: Google Maps / Google Earth

    Halfway Hills, UT

    Placemark: Google Maps / Google Earth

    Halfway, VA

    Placemark: Google Maps / Google Earth

    And Halfway, WY

    Placemark: Google Maps / Google Earth

    Interesting thing to note, Halfway, MD is actually halfway along I81 through MD. Five miles in, and five miles out.

    • Steve says:

      No shit… you don’t think perhaps that’s why it was named “Halfway”?

      There are lots of pubs in the UK called things like “Halfway Inn” and it’s not coincidence that they lie halfway between two big towns or cities.

  7. Phydeaux says:

    Might I add “Surprise, Nebraska”. It really comes out of nowhere.

    Placemark: Google Maps / Google Earth

  8. Jess Carter says:

    In Aberdeenshire, there’s a place called Lost: it’s so big that it doesn’t even appear on Google Maps. (But the signs saying “Lost” still get pinched.)

  9. dcseain says:

    I live off of Temporary Rd in Reston, VA, one of three Temorary Rds in the US according to Google Maps.

    There is an Ad Hoc Rd in Great Falls, VA. I’m told that Ad Hoc Rd was named for the Ad Hoc committee that never reached a decision on a name for the road when they named the roads in Fairfax County in the 1960s.

  10. Mario says:

    Back in my student days in Massachusetts we often joked about Athol, MA.

    • MADMAJ says:

      That is HILARIOUS!!
      wouldn’t it be funny if the movie ‘On Golden Pond’ was set there?? Then Kate Hepburn’s character could introduce herself as “Ethel Thayer from Athol, Massachussetts”

  11. Cyndilou says:

    One of my personal favorites has always been West, Texas. (Whenever my friends and I head that direction, we call it “west-comma-texas” to avoid confusion. :D )

    It’s between Austin and Dallas, and it makes for a good kolache stop when driving between those cities!

  12. Strixus says:

    No one mentions Between, GA? I used to drive through it pretty regularly.

    Placemark: Google Maps / Google Earth

  13. haroldg says:

    There is a town in Ga. called Between, It is on hwy 78
    between Loganville and Monroe east of Atlanta

  14. Vince says:

    Ian,
    Why Arizona is correct, I hate that place, try spending 4 years in blistering heat and nothing to do.

  15. arthur says:

    In France there is a town called CONDOM.
    I won’t do the jokes. I have driven through a lot of France but never actually went there. although it was on signposts.

  16. Garrett says:

    In West Virginia we have a town called Mabie *pronounced maybe, obviously* and It’d definitely work for this.

    Driver: Can you tell me where I am?

    Passer-by: Mabie.

    Driver: Ummm…okay, I sorta need to know, can you tell me?

    Passer-by: Mabie

    and yeah, you get the idea. =]

  17. AJ says:

    No mention of Hot Coffee, Mississippi?

  18. fidgety_sam says:

    I have always wondered – Halfway to WHAT??????????

  19. krazykellen says:

    How about Welcome, Minnesota?

    Driver: Can you tell me where I am?

    Passer-by: Welcome.

    Driver: Um…thanks

  20. Bobbi says:

    How about Bugscuffle, TN, and Bucksnort, TN?

    And of course there is good old King of Prussia, PA

  21. Matt says:

    Don’t forget “Truth or Consequences” in New Mexico http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Truth_or_Consequences,_New_Mexico

  22. sean says:

    My favorite i ever seen is right off of the I-95 in Connecticut, very close to New York. the city is spelled Mianus and is literally pronounced My Anus.

    Driver: Can you tell me where I am?
    Local: Mianus.
    Driver: *flips the bird and speeds off*

  23. me says:

    in austria theres a place called fucking:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fucking,_Austria

    plus, in my language my home town is called forward.
    where are u going? forward.

    people allways joke about they live in backwards. not funny after the 56 time.

  24. notreally says:

    Accident, MD (aint no accident)

  25. Kenny says:

    There’s a town in Germany called “Fucking”.

  26. maddy says:

    i live in a town called ware in hertfordshire england

  27. maddy says:

    i think that beats all of these lol

  28. Lea says:

    Don’t forget Normal, Illinois!
    Can’t count the number of times I’ve heard “So there is a NORMAL police department?(high school, post office, etc) The mayor actually carries 20 dollars in his pocket to give out if someone manages to crack an original joke about the city!
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Normal,_Illinois

  29. mew says:

    Don’t forget That rd in Bloomington Indiana,

  30. Metz says:

    What about Weare, NH

  31. Zarn says:

    There’s a village in Yorkshire called Crackpot.

    Driver: Excuse me, where am I?
    Local gentleman: Crackpot.
    Driver: What did you call me?!
    [serious beating ensue]

  32. SirMapsAlot says:

    There’s a town in Georgia called Hopeulikit – pronounced ‘Hope you like it’.

  33. Jerry says:

    Just 100 mi inland from Vancouver BC is the town of Hope. The main highway to the interior runs through it spawning endless “beyond Hope” jokes

  34. Lorraine says:

    Shocking that no one mentioned Intercourse, PA n or Bird in the Hand,PA!

  35. aarray says:

    You missed Climax, MI

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